Title: You

My days are broken up by the dreams of girls I'll never be

and when my nights are cold I try to think of you laying with me

the coldness of my sheets have left me struggling to breathe

but I'm still holding on, holding onto you

It's been days since I've woke up in a panicked mess

you come around and act like you've never been away

but all I know is the minutes I'm waiting for you to call

am I too much for you? why would you even bother at all?

why are the hours so long whilst I wait to see you

to be back in your arms, my home

they're all I know

the days apart are taking their toll on our love

the distance it makes me wonder

when will I ever

be enough, be enough

when will I ever

get to feel your touch

every night 

will that day ever come for us?

why do I bother

waiting around?

when seem so fucking blasé about what we've found here

and is this just you? a cold wall to talk to

is there any warmth under there that I can drain out

is it just me?

am I too plain?

is it just me?

am I just gonna be a part-time thing

I'm getting so tired of having to wait to come home

come home, come home to you

the days apart are taking their toll on our love

the distance it makes me wonder

when will I ever

be enough, be enough

when will I ever

get to feel your touch

every night 

will that day ever come for us?

last night I dreamt that we were laughing in your house

and the only time we had to say goodbye was short-term

am I the only one who has these dreams

am I the only one who feels this way about us?

the days apart are taking their toll on our love

the distance it makes me wonder

when will I ever

be enough, be enough

when will I ever

get to feel your touch

every night 

will that day ever come for us?

maybe it's me

maybe it's because I'm not her

maybe it's me

maybe it's because I give too much

maybe it's you

you don't know how you feel about us

maybe it's time, it's time to give it up

Title: Unspoken Truths

Every woman has had a bad man in their life
and mine was treating me wrong
so foolish and unkind
to deserve the marks of your big man hands
all over my thighs


bruised, black and blue
I'm sure you can relate
and when I'm alone now
the dark makes me irate


I remember the feeling of love
the warmth from your laugh
the way that you used to hold my hand
as we walked through the park


bruised, black and blue
my body your canvas to break
I'm all alone now
and it is better this way


setting free,
running as fast as my feet will carry me
setting free
running as fast as my feet will carry me

Title: Heated

I lay on the table
undressed but still clothes in all my fear
you're taking your time boy
you're making me want you more each minute


I can't quite understand you yet
but this lust is all I'm needing
I can't quite understand you yet
but this lust is so deceiving


I'm on all fours
your hands they grab every part of me
and this isn't love
but what does it matter
you're killing me


I can't quite understand you yet
but you're on my mind, all the time
I can't quite understand you yet
but you're on my mind and I'm ready to let it go
I'm ready to let it go


my muscles start to relax
the ice cubes melting
the heat of this moment is burning me
but I kind of like it, pain and pleasure

I'm on your bed
the sheets are slowly drifting
my body writhes
and yet you still haven't been in me


I can't quite understand you yet
but you're on my mind
even when I'm with someone else
I feel your grind

Title: Grit

I'll never congratulate your misfortunes
I'll never let go of what we've discovered here
I'll never let your heart get broken
I'll never let you down, like the ones before


you say you've been hurt so many times
you've forgotten how to love a love like mine
and still I'm holding on incase it gets better
and still I'm wondering if you'll stick around


it's been so long, my love
it's been so long
your inconsolable at times, your mind so warped from all the girls who did you wrong
but still you carry on, you carry on


I can't quite compare you to anyone I've had in my sheets before
you have a lust a passion I just want more of
and still I'm wondering if this is all we are
when we are naked and wrapped around each other


I have never loved like this before
my whole body aches and throbs right into my core
you make me feel like I can feel some warmth again
so used to coldness, dark and trying not to let him win

it's been so long, my love
it's been so very long
and we are stronger now we've been through it all
I apologise for all my late night dreams
I apologise for all my late night seams coming undone


I have never wanted anything this much
than coming home to you and giving you my love
the way you look at me as I slowly undress
the way you grit your teeth as I try and digest
all the love you give to me every day

Title: Anyway

You say it anyway
I can't believe it's done
your words cut through me darling and still you are the one

you say it anyway
I can't hold back much more
yet still you are the only one who leaves my body sore
I'm wrapped up in the hope that we will last
I've spent several months in nightmares so we could forget the past
you still wonder,  how I will ever forgive
but I promise you that I have tried and still I want to give you all of my love


our naked bodies clash
we've bruised all that our bones have become
I'm dripping for you now
my tears inconsolable


you say it anyway
and still you are the one
I don't know why we argue
when we're raw and seeing the sun
the only string of light that dangles like a treat towards a dog
I'm down on all fours ready to give you all I have
and still you wonder


my heart in-between your very teeth
you're biting down harder with each attempt I make to breathe
and this pain curses my whole body
little did I know you're still fooling around

our naked bodies clash
we've bruised all that our bones have become
I'm dripping for you now
my tears inconsolable


you say it anyway
I know that you're a liar
I'm always being played for being the one who never stops the fire from burning out


our naked bodies clash, for the last time
I've bruised and cut my skin for your pleasure
I'm dripping for you now
soaked in my own sadness


I can't believe my luck
it's always the other who says I fuck it up
but these words are left unspoken
with every breath I am hurting
these words are lingering on your tongue

Title: 4am Insomniac Thoughts

As you rest, as you lay there dreaming
I'm battling thoughts about you leaving
I lay awake wondering when I'll ever be a priority
as you rest, I hope that you won't forget me
when I finally find the courage


you're elusive, and I'm awake
when will you set me free?
when will you love completely?

your hands could be responsible for feelings I desire to know,
the complications of love leave stains upon my porcelain body
and are you leaving?
because it feels as though I've already lost you
are you leaving?


I settle in rough tides, you crave a calm life
I am sailing, drifting in clearer waters than ever before
I hope that my body will one day sink like lead
my body slowly unravelling to my hearts shore

you're elusive, and I'm awake
when will you set me free?
when will you love completely?


I still dream of us
I sleep with you stroking my hair from within my pillow
the pillow that saves all these precious minutes where I'm with you
I dream of sleep, I crave rest, to be rested with you
I dream of us, finally somewhere


I open my eyes and I'm still not next to you,
I guess that destiny lies in the hands that will eventually set me free
your hands linger, they have a stench of cold effort


you're elusive, and I'm awake
when will you set me free?
when will you love completely?

Title: Cut Open

I'm a fool, for wanting your untouched emotion
your arms always so cold and so distant, wrap me in all that you could ever give
we lay for hours just silent, I never know what's truly on your mind
we lay for hours in pure silence, it's the loudest quiet I've ever known


my heart is open, my heart always loving
I've never been so exhausted of giving all I have to give
and I've never wanted a man like this before
no I've never loved a man


can I ask you? can I ask you what has always been on my mind?
what is it you're wanting from me?
what is it I'm giving you?
why is it that you're still so cold?


I'm a trigger for trouble,
each second that passes is laced in the breath that I waste
I am but an empty vessel
carrying an abundance of love and warmth for you, always for you


my heart is open, my heart always loving
I've never been exhausted of giving all I have to give
and I've never wanted a man like this before
no I've never loved a man


when will I hear truth in your voice? and warmth in your touch?
your words are just emptiness now, they're just so tough to consume
my body so fragile, from rations of affection
my body so fragile, your words just cut right through



I'll never be what anyone desires,
I'll never be what anyone truly loves
I am so disgusted with myself
when will I ever be enough?
I try and try, I try and I try again
an uphill battle that I have no energy for